I regret that I didn't hug you enough; that I didn't tell you I love you enough. I always thought you were too forgiving. You saw the good in everyone while I was there warning you about trusting people. Countless times you'd come home gushing about how much you're in love. You were so happy. The little things, you always appreciated. When you cry about a simple crush, I tell you it's okay. There will be more love in the future. You're still young. That's what I kept telling you. I thought I knew more because I was older but you knew more than I did.
When you had your first kiss, you were so rattled and excited at the same time. You came home and told me all about it and I just smiled. I didn't share your enthusiasm, your excitement. I regret that. It's like somehow you knew there wasn't going to be forever in our lives so you went ahead and let yourself be happy for every small thing in the world.
I miss you. All the time. Every now and then, I'd think of you and tell myself, you would have been done in school this year. You would have been 19, 20, 21. You would have seen my son. We could be out on a beach right now! And it hurts. Every time I think about you, I feel hurt. I miss you. I try to find comfort in the thought that you're in a better place but it doesn't make me feel any better. I love you so much. I love you like a sister. Years after, I still haven't fully accepted that you're gone.
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